Hamlet Parody (Act 3, Scene 1)
To fry, or not to
fry: that is the
question. Whether 'tis nobler to
the heart to broil
the Salmon and Carp of outrages
or to take arms against the sea
and by opposing, reduce it.
To diet: to slim
no more; and by a diet to say we
end the days of hardened arteries,
and the numerous by-passes.
That flesh is not used to,
'tis a consummation
devoutly to be wished.
To diet, to slim;
To slim: perchance to beautify;
Ay, there's the reward;
for in that diet from hell what beauty
when we have shuffled off these
extra pounds, must give us confience;
There's the respect that makes the
suffering so worthwhile.
Tanna Lynn Pekrul - 1995